A Day In The Life

Today I am tired.

I did my best yesterday. I really did.

I actually exercised! I went on a short walk with a dear friend. She pushed her 4 year old in a stroller and we had a nice visit. And she gave me pears from her tree!

So, to recap–I actually participated in a socially distanced social event where I got to talk to a friend AND I got exercise! High five to me!! (And the crowds go wild!! AHHHHH!)

Antonio got Dan to school in the morning and let me sleep in. Another amazing event.

Then, to completely prove his love for me, he gave me the scrambled eggs with melted swiss cheese that he had made for himself because he saw that I was drooling a little bit when I passed him in the kitchen. It was an act of delicious love.

I worked a full day from 9-6pm. And I got two reports done. So there’s another go me moment! Go me! Rah rah rah! Siss boom bah! Woot!

At 10am, Dan called from the school because he forgot his glucose monitor. He wears a cool chip thing that tells this monitor what his blood sugar levels are at all times–but only if the monitor is within 20 feet of the child. This is an important thing to have so that we know if his blood sugar is super low, or super high. Antonio and I ran around the house looking for it. Finally, Antonio found it in his bed. I ran it up to the school, but I forgot my mask, so Dan came out to the car to get it from me. His blood sugar was at 320. We talked about the correction dose he needed to take in the office, then we went over what he was going to eat for lunch, and how much insulin he needed to take for lunch. He mentioned that he didn’t want to go back into school. He is in a sort of in school detention for bad behavior, and I think he’s bored to tears. He agreed to try to stick it out, but only because lunch was going to be orange chicken, and he loves orange chicken.

At about 1pm, right after lunch, Dan called from the school again and told me he was feeling sick to his stomach. In a pre-covid, pre-diabetes world, I would have told him to stick it out for another 90 minutes. But, I can’t do that now. I closed the office and drove back to the school.

Meanwhile, Antonio was applying for jobs. He’s been faithfully seeking, but with no prospects. Another friend messaged me and asked me if he would be interested in working with her husband at his restaurant. At the same time, Antonio told me got an offer to work as a freight remover at the airport. Two job offers in the same day! We talked about things. Pros and cons. He decided to try out the restaurant job and see if he would be a good fit with them. The freight job is more money, but I worry about him hurting his body. He’s an old man! He’s super strong too, but I love him and want him to stay healthy.

With Dan home sick, I barked that I wanted him to either do homework, or stay in bed.

At about 5pm, Antonio came down stairs and basically communicated a need to get a way from the rebellious child. He growled, took the keys, and left.

I went upstairs to get the child and his homework. In the office, the child ranted. “I want to drop out of school!”

“You can’t drop out of school. You’re too young. We’ll go to jail.”

“Well as soon as I can, I’m leaving school.”

I rolled my eyes. My eyes are always rolling. It’s ridiculous.

He did his best to make helping him a complete nightmare. He screamed, he yelled, he screamed louder.

I just read the instructions out loud on his worksheet. I asked him, “Will you watch me do the first problem so you can see how it’s done?”

“No! It’s impossible!”

“Well, you need to write down the problem on a scrap paper. It will help your mind organize things better.”

“I want to do it in my head! I like it better when I can do it in my head!”

“I do too, but since you can’t yet, do it on a piece of paper.”

“No!!!!!”

Screaming continues. I remain calm. I start to do the problem out loud. Soon, he realizes that I am horrible at math and he starts to correct my work. “No! You’re doing it wrong. It goes like this!”

Antonio walks in the door with groceries and fried chicken from the store.

The room is silent. I finally say, “We’re finally making progress. Either stay here and stay quiet, or pass through.”

He replied, with the fear of a father who can recognize the aftermath of a tantrum, “I am going to make corn on the cob to go with the chicken. Thank you.” And then he scooted through the office to go upstairs to make dinner. I love him. So much.

Dan seemed to acknowledge this kind of cease fire. Slowly, he began to do his math homework. After solving a few problems, he said, “I get it! This is fun! I like math again! I don’t want to drop out now.”

Meanwhile, I worked on a report for work and gave thanks to God that no customers came in the office during the great math tantrum of 2020.

We stayed in the office to give him more time, but I finally told him to gather his work so we could close up and go eat dinner.

After the delicious dinner, I crawled into bed to try to de-stress for a bit. I heard Dan and Antonio watch a youtube video on carpentry. They like boring videos.

At 8pm, I came out and we read scriptures together. Dan was super antsy. After about 10 minutes, he said, “I feel so happy when we read scriptures!” It felt so good hearing that. Antonio was ready to pass out. He declared himself done for the day. We said family prayer, and he went to bed. Dan asked if we could watch an episode of Glee together. While we watched, he snuggled up to me and held my hand, and we both ate delicious pears.

It was a blissful evening after a long day.

He took his night meds. His night meds are a melatonin and a tiny little pill that helps him stay calm.

I forgot to pay attention. I was too wrapped up in the good feelings. Dan wasn’t paying attention either. He took his morning pills. And we both forgot about his night time long lasting insulin dose.

His morning meds consist of a pill to help ADHD, guanfacine, and the same tiny little pill that helps him stay calm. After years of trial and error, these three pills help him to function relatively well at school with autism and ADHD.

When I realized the mistake, I was too tired to care.

I told him to take a dose of melatonin at 9:30pm.

Then he took another dose as midnight.

And then another at 3am.

He never went back to sleep after waking up at 3am. I kind of fell asleep about 1 am after giving him a shot of insulin while he was sleeping. We did another shot at 3am. Antonio got up with him at about 5am. I slept in until 7:30am. Antonio and I both drove him to school, then I drove Antonio to his new job interview so I could have the car in case Dan needs to be picked up from school again because he was up half the night.

And now it’s 10 am the next day. I’m at work. And I am officially exhausted. And my dear Antonio is starting a new job and I will go back to doing the working/caring for child work life balance. And it will be okay. And Ruth Bader Ginsburg just died. And the GOP is going to try and ram through a Supreme Court Justice. And I want to do theatre again. And I start at Gardner Village in a couple of weeks. And another friend just died. And I’m worried about my parents. And I don’t really have time to worry about anyone. And I need to call my grandma and my nana. And… did I mention I’m tired?

This is my day. There are really lovely moments. There are moments of vigilance. And there are moments when I forget to be vigilant. When you’re raising a child with ADHD, autism, and Type 1 Diabetes, you have to be vigilant or things go sideways fast. And you have to be okay with that. You’re tired a lot. But you have an amazing child who surprises you with his wit, his honest observations, his love, his sweetness. And his ability to stay awake for hours at a time when all you want is for him to sleep!

I wouldn’t trade it for the world.